Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, and with it comes the pressure of making it le most romantic day of the year. The good news is, if you and your partner have an amazing sex life and neither of you feels inclined to change anything about it, you’re already winning. But if you want to make Valentine’s Day sex extra special this year, here’s what to remember. (Starting with the fact that Valentine’s Day is ultimately just like any other day, and you don’t need to spend a fortune on it or go super above and beyond to make your partner feel loved.)
First off, the coolest thing about Valentine’s Day sex is that it’s pretty much the only activity you can do on V-Day that doesn’t require a reservation or an overpriced Uber. You can make it hotter than usual for $free.99 right from the comfort of your own home by upping the romance factor and gazing deep into each other’s eyes or by upping the kink factor and implementing a little consensual rough play. Or both! Romance and kink aren’t mutually exclusive, and they’re both reliant on trust among partners, so…what’s more intimate than that?
Whatever route you go, just don’t forget to communicate regularly and practice aftercare, aka the act of checking in with your partner after sex to make sure their needs are met and that they’re comfy and happy, which = a great way to show them how much you love them. Isn’t that what V-Day’s all about? So! Ready to learn how to spice up Valentine’s Day sex (or sex any day of the year)? Read on for tips to help you unleash your inner horny self. Thank us later.
Play a sexy game
This is a great one if your partner is competitive. There are loads of sexy games on the market. Find a card game where each card either asks you a question or gives you a dare and you have to answer it/do it. Each prompt gets hotter and hotter, culminating in sexual tension that results in piping-hot, I’ve-waited-so-long-for-this kind of sex.
Watch ethical porn together
If you’ve never paid for porn before, now’s the time! Find an ethical porn site with content geared toward the female gaze—aka porn where the woman actually looks like she’s having a good time and it’s believable. Watch it (or listen to it or read it out loud) with your partner, ~touch each other~, and watch what happens.
Have some fun with a couples vibrator
If you and your person can’t be physically together this Valentine’s Day, no worries. Sex-toy brands like Satisfyer have apps that pair with their vibrators and sex toys. When you download it to your phone, you can control the pressure, speed pulses, etc. of the vibrator or sex toy all from within the app itself. This is especially perfect if you want to sex up this V-Day because with consent from you, it also lets your partner control your toy from their phone. This means that no matter where in the world you are, your partner can join you during your masturbation session. Hot.
Get high on love
One way to make giving and receiving oral even better? Flavored lube. While vulvas and penises (and yes, anuses) in their natural state are alluring enough, some folks prefer a little added sweetener. Luckily, there’s a seemingly endless supply of flavored lubricants to choose from.
Play with temperature
This is your sign to bring some heat (or chill) to the bedroom. Temperature play is what happens when you use hot and cold sensations to add a lil spice in the bedroom. (Think ice cubes, hot water, candles, etc.) You can also buy a warming vibrator. (Yep! Those exist.)
Spice up your sex with some role-play
Plan on meeting at a “bar” in your kitchen. Then introduce yourself to your significant other when they happen to sit right next to you. From then on, you two can play out a situation with completely different occupations and names. The possibilities are endless! Take it to the bedroom and end your role-play fantasy with a bang.
Have sex before dinner
Think about it: You have a delicious glass of wine…and another…and another. Then dinner, then dessert, and all of a sudden, it’s midnight and you have work the next day. Full, buzzed, and exhausted aren’t always the best circumstances for boning. So get it on before you leave for your date instead, and spend the rest of the meal basking in a sexy afterglow. And, you know, more wine.
Or better yet, get it on the next morning
You shouldn’t go into a holiday that’s supposed to be fun all worked up over expectations of sex. If it doesn’t happen naturally, that’s okay! Enter: morning sex. There’s nothing quite like rolling over in a warm, groggy haze and whispering all the things you wish you had done last night into your partner’s ear. (You can be a little late to work.)
Buy each other one new sexy item for the bedroom
A massage oil candle or a new vibrator, perhaps? If your hope is to shake up your lurvemaking routine, commit to bringing one new thing to the bedroom.
Spend the day sexting
Nothing builds up anticipation like sexting. If you shoot off quick, sexy missives of what you want to do to each other throughout the day, then come nighttime, you’ll have a hot script of your own to act out. The buildup is unbearable in the best possible way.
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